In about two weeks, a friend of Henrik and his ex is coming up... She will get to know we're together, and then tell his ex....scary...

01. Reply with your name and I will write something about you.
02. I will then tell what song/movie remind me of you.
03. If I were to apply an o'clock to you, it would be...
04. I will try to name a single word that best describes you.
05. I'll tell you the most memorable moment I've had with you.
06. I will tell you what animal you remind me of.
07. I'll then tell you something that I've always wondered about you.
08. Put this in your journal.

Guess I should write a ”goodbye to 2004 entry, hello to 2005” entry… A lot of things happened last year…I broke up with Robin, we went back and forth for a long time, my feelings for him disappeared, his went crazy, I found Håvard and decided to move to Sandefjord. (The town I now go to school in)
The apartment is looking good now, we did three coats of white this week (Håvard and I), had some sex in the hallway ;) and almost in the apartment. We were stopped though, because the owners knocked on the door and needed me for something. (damn!) I really like being with him, he makes me smile a lot. I feel like he respects me, and all my weird thoughts and meanings. Of course I don’t know if he does, if he’s just playing with me…but I don’t think he is  He invites me to family dinners and other weird things, he comes painting with me, he plays with my sister and brother…he is a really good guy. And since he likes the same music as me, he’s good.
It’s weird…I think I’ve fallen hard for him and he not for me. It just sometimes feels a bit one-sided, but I think it’s because the last thing I remember from good relationships is from when Robin and I had been together for 10months and we knew each other well and he was head-over-heels-cheating-but-in-love-with-me, so it’s wrong comparing Robin and Håvard. They’re very different  but I like Håvard better than I liked Robin in the beginning I think…feel safer as well.
I trust him. Even though he doesn’t tell me every little detail from his life, I trust him to tell the things I need to know. If he cheats on me he’ll ruin me. But I know he won’t, he’s not like that at all =). Hmm..the flow stopped now…Buffy came on TV! I like Buffy and I miss Jen. Talked with her a bit lately, well, texted. It's nice texting with her :)

Sitting here wondering about what to wear...going to a Christmas lunch today, and maybe a Christmas dinner afterwards. Wouldn't mind dropping one of them as I'm beginning to feel fat ;) Had a big dinner on Christmas Eve, a bigger one yesterday...
Oh well :)
The Christmas dinner is at Håvard's place, he invited me. His dad is having a lot of friends over that he doesn't know, so he wanted me to come as well. The problem is getting up there. I mean, I can get to the town...but he lives on top of the mountain, which is not walking distance if you're going to be pretty afterwards. Besides it's cold outside. So now I'm waiting for him to call with his decision on what I am to do. He needs to find someone who can pick me up...
I hope he can save me from that Christmas lunch ;)
I got a Disney dvd and a really cool necklace from him for Christmas. But no sweet card =P, I've never managed to find a guy who thinks about things like that. Except for Jesper sending me a really cute Valentine's Day card once. Jesper turned out to be an asshole when it comes to relationships, he's forever cheating on those poor girls...glad I'm not one of them ;) But he's great as a friend =)
Apart from that I put up some new pictures of Håvard and some friends at my site, http://community.webshots.com/user/eve_elandia, if anyone wants to check it out. I like him so I don't care what you say about him ;)
So..back to waht I'm supposed to wear. The problem is that I have to find something that would look good at both places. So right now I'm wearing a black top, which is halfway "hello cleavage" and "goodbye christmasstomach", so I like it ;) And a pair of nice pants...which are a tad too tight so I'm wearing one of those 'hold-in-push-up' strømpebukser under..
I need to go put make-up on now though, and brush my teeth...take care and merry christmas!

Hmm…I’ve got a boyfriend now…Håvard…the guy from the concert… *smiles softly*
We decided to be official on Saturday, but we’ve been exclusive for a longer while. What do say about him? Well..he makes me smile  He likes the same music as I do, he giggles, he make me giggle, he holds me tight, he kisses me, he strokes my face, he plays with my hair..everything is good. He doesn’t want to have sex though. We fool around a lot, and when I say a lot I mean a lot. I feel so great whenever he smiles at me or kisses me. It makes me want to kiss and hug all day long and giggle and ask silly questions. He says he’s never met anyone like me, not even close. And he means it in a positive way, that he likes me different. The first thing he looks for in girls is a personality, a special personality, someone who differs a bit more than everyone differs from each other. (And I’m pretty weird.) We’ve been together a lot…well..two times a week since we first met, and we’ve texted tonnes and talked a lot on msn. Right now he’s out of credit so I don’t get to text any…
Hmm…I spent the night at his place one weekend, while mom thought I was in Sandefjord at a class party. We fooled around a lot, we always do…we have like this thirst and horniness when we’re together. We fooled around for hours, slept for 30mins, woke up and did the same all the time. All night long. But me, being Eve didn’t want to have sex then, so that never happened. And now he doesn’t want to have sex. It’s weird…a guy saying no to sex… We were doing our stuff on Thursday, (we’re getting really good at ”watching movies” ;)) and I wanted sex and showed him..it was obvious…but he didn’t want to. I don’t know why he didn’t want to, but later on he said he wanted to but there wasn’t enough time left. I hate it when guys say that, because it turns me on. So when he said it, I got all turned on again. He has a good way of doing that, but then again, most guys have. But he makes me smile and stuff at the same time.
It’s weird… We met up on the concert, kissed, things went weird, Robin became an ass and started threatening to 1) kill himself, 2) beat up Håvard. Håvard didn’t like that, and started saying he couldn’t talk to me anymore, but in the end he did. So then we met a couple of times in secret, and everything was so great with him. We talk about everything, I ask all my weird questions, we watch movies, he says sweet things  I wish things had gone easier between me and Robin. That we were friends and he stopped wanting me. He called me on Thursday after I had been with Håvard. Started talking about how he wanted me back and how I should think about it. He gave me a couple of tirades on how he would change, how he would cut down on sex, stop nagging me, always support me, become more romantic, make everything perfect and stuff… But guess what Robin..I don’t want to. Not really because of Håvard, but because it would never work between us again. Too much has happened between Robin and me to ever make things work again. I wish we could be friends though. But he doesn’t want to. But that ain’t my problem…
Håvard has an ex, a girl named Ingvild. She is from the same town as Jesper, my ex, but she’s a bitch. She takes the same type karate classes as Håvard, in the different town. The thing is though, they have their thing when they get new belts in the same place. I guess they gather all of East Norway and do it.. And Håvard actually asked me if it was alright that he went, since she was there. Of course it was alright, and even better that he asked! Made me smile  he also called me ”my girl” on Thursday…god I’m a sucker for romance.
This has become an entry I’ve used several days to write, almost like a letter. We met on Saturday  First I went to his place, got to meet his father, his brother, his stepmom and a girl they take care of sometimes. She was really sweet, and he was very good with her. She’s 4 yrs old and has a lot of ants in her pants it seems. She was forever jumping and talking and hugging..just couldn’t sit still for 3 seconds. But I liked how Håvard seemed to have a sea of patience with her  after that we went down to a mate of his, Lasse was his name, I’ve never met him before. We drank a bit, saw a couple music videos (his computer is attached to the tv), and then we went tequilahunting. We wandered around for 40mins, and it was frikkin cold!
After that we went to my place, because mom wanted to go out. So we came there, a bit drunk, but mom was upstairs showering so we went downstairs and started fooling around. We fool around a lot I think…  We didn’t have sex this weekend either, but we talked a bit about it. And it’s not because of me, not because of the way I look or anything. He just wants to wait..he didn’t want to on Saturday because of the alcohol. He licked me though…it felt gooooood. I didn’t go down on him, but I wanted to..I don’t know if he would let me though… I’m not allowed to look at it…which is mean! I like looking at him. He likes touching me..and he likes my ass..and the rest of my body… He was happy that me and Lasse didn’t become enemies or anything like that, that I liked him. He said it was important. What the hell am I gonna get him for Christmas?? It’s started bothering me… I want to find something special and unexpensive. So I’m trying to learn small stuff about him, to try to find something. We talked a bit about shot glasses, and maybe I’ll find a cool one. I am NOT gonna encourage his smoking though ;) Any ideas to what?
We kissed and hugged and hugged and kissed a lot…and since I’m at my mom’s place we have to sleep in separate beds. We fell asleep together though, and I woke up 10mins after and went up to my bed. He told me in the morning that when he had woken up, he had first been confused because he didn’t know where he was. Then he couldn’t understand why I wasn’t there. Poor guy ;) But I really like cuddling with him. We’re meeting up on Wednesday..dunno what we’re gonna do though. Prolly kiss and cuddle and hug and stuff, that’s what we usually do ;) Hopefully listen to music! I miss MUSIC! How am I gonna survive without music? Håvard had to ride the bus home today without music…aww..poor lil fella who won’t have sex with me ;)

Peter's been nagging me to write about my summer a bit...so I guess I should =)

England
I guess I should start here, as it is the beginning. But...blergh...We left from Stavanger the 8th of July, took the boat over to Newcastle and arrived there quite early so we started driving down straight away. After a night at some Travel Inn, we ended up at our rented house on the beach in Saunton. We stayed there for a week, going to nearby towns and the beach every day. The beach was wonderful! A surfing beach so a lot of pale surfing dudes, 'cause usually they just wear wetsuits all the time.
We had a really great time, the house was so big! Five HUGE bedrooms, a great kitchen and a wonderful living room. It also had 4 bathrooms and a huge garden. And the view was wonderful.
After a week we went up to Sheffield to stay there for a couple of days, it was pretty nice, we just shopped a lot... And then we spent the last two days in Newcastle, where we went to the Metro Centre which is one of the biggest shopping centers in Europe I think they said. They have like 350 shops and are expanding...
After that we took the boat up to Stavanger again and I left at 4am for...

USA
The plane trip wasn't all that exciting, I got switched around a lot due to babies and stuff. I met my Grandma..blablabla...two weeks of shopping and meeting old people and their grandchildren. I don't really want to write anymore I think...
I met a guy on the plane trip back though, he sat behind me and we started talking when we entered the plane. Then a flight attendant came up and asked if the person next to me wanted to switch with him so it would be easier for us to talk. So we did so. =) We talked a lot! About music, sex, everything! We also got drunk...'cause alcohol is free in the air. So we started with some beers, as I could order that.. (the flight attendants didn't ask).. And then he started to order drinks and we shared them =) I decided I didn't like rum and we got drunk.
He was on his way to Iraq, so when we got to Schiphol he had to go to another gate and stuff... But we had a really nice time and ended it all with a hug =)

Birthday
I turned 17 on Thursday!!! I got waterskis from my mother, $200 from my father and yesterday (Saturday) I celebrated it with some girls. We had taco and talked a lot. I got a lot of nice earrings, and a nice top and a g-string and a necklace and a teddybear and loads of hugs. I also got to meet Jen's new boyfriend! He was nice...I think she misses him...

98% of teenagers do or have tried pot. If you're one of the 2% that hasn't, put this in your journal.

=)

Post anything that you want (in comments), and post it anonymously. Anything. A story, a secret, a confession, a fear, a love -- anything. Post anonymously (if you want) and post honestly. Post twice if you'd like. Then, put this in your LJ to see what your friends (and perhaps others who you don't even realize read your LJ) have to say.

Post anything that you want (in comments), and post it anonymously. Anything. A story, a secret, a confession, a fear, a love -- anything. Post anonymously (if you want) and post honestly. Post twice if you'd like. Then, put this in your LJ to see what your friends (and perhaps others who you don't even realize read your LJ) have to say.

I know I don't update as often as I probably should, but it's sometimes so hard to find the words I need to express my thoughts. And I forget LJ once in a while too, even though I check my friends' page every day. Here's a short update of whats been going on lately in my life;

• Easter

Well, let me start with the easter holidays. I travelled up north friday before the easter hols, and then off to the island on monday. All of whom I've talked to for over a year know that I go there every year to visit friends and family. We weren't too many this year though, and there was almost no snow =( . But there was a guy there whom I wasn't related to, and we flirted a bit. Nothing more though, because it would ruin our friendship.
Everything was really great up there, got to meet all my cousins again. My cousin, A-H, is finally off drugs, she's been off drugs for months now. I'm really proud of her, because it's tough up there in her town. It's a fucking unhealthy environment and the people are bugs.

• The week after Easter

I arrived home again on Tuesday, the day we started school again. And on Wednesday I met up with Robin, who by the way had sex with his best friend's ex girlfriend. His best friend totally flipped, and they're not best friends anymore. Robin doesn't really seem to understand that he shouldn't be drinking.
On Thursday I went up to Oslo to go to a comedy show, and meet up with Rune. It was really fun and nice.
Then on Sunday I heard some bad things about Robin again. You all know how he cheated on me twice last year? First after the sumo nationalship, where he kissed two girls and oralled with one. Then on New Years Eve where he fooled around with one. Well, seems like he's had more fun. First, he fooled around with two girls one of the times he went on The Danish Boat (you take the boat down to Denmark and up again..party on the boat), and almost had sex with one in the bathroom. Second, he fooled around with one of the girls he had sex with the day we broke up....
So guess what? I'm totally broken... But I also discovered that I'm getting kinda immune to his doings, 'cause he's hurt me so many times that it's getting pretty hard to crack my shell. I feel sorry for the next guy I'm getting with, hope he understands that it will take a while for me to trust again.

• Geilo-weekend, April 16th-18th

On Friday the 16th, me and a bunch of friends went up to the mountains! We took the train all the way up to a place called Geilo, and stayed there for the weekend. We were 11 teenagers, 9 from my class (including me) and two other guys. It was really great! Everyone was so nice to each other, and I've never had a better train trip. We had so much fun! I made two new friends, and got to know 8 other friends a lot better. And two of the kids in my class got together! (We've been seeing it all along, that they would be getting together), and another one of the girls in my class got together with one of the guys that came along.
We arrived at the cottage rather late, so we had dinner and then went to bed. The next morning we got up, ate a nice breakfast and then ran out in the snow with our snowboards and skis! It was really great, the last trip of the season. After the slopes closed, we went to a hotel and used their swimming pool. There we had a lot of water fights and other various games. (I know my English sucks right now, but I can't be bothered to do anything about it) We had tacos for dinner afterwards, and then we all watched You've got Mail cramped together in a sofa. We piled on top of each other, I piled myself on a guy ;) he was really sweet.

Ah well...more updates later I guess...

xxx

If you've had LJ for over a year, look back to one year ago today and link back to and quote from your entries of that day.

If you have more than one year, go back for the same day for each past year and quote for them as well.

If you've had LJ for under a year, quote from the first month you had LJ and then halfway through the time you've had it.

this entry I made a year ago;
" Tonight [28 Feb 2003|07:02am]
I'm gonna meet up with Robin today...I'm nervous...We're gonna watch a rented movie..and be all alone, just us two. No way I'm gonna have sex with him yet, just so you know that... But I tell you-it's still quite easy me for me to be nervous. If you know me a bit closer than just LJ - you all know about the incident on the beach (I don't think I've posted that in my LJ..but maybe I have) and my fear that kinda turns into me being a bit more open about sexuality, as long as 1) I don't have feelings for him/her, 2) I have LOTS of feelings for him her/her - it's ok, and I still am open. But if 3) I'm in the stage where I have feelings, but not too strong yet because it's too early....Guess which stage I am in *rolleyes*

(For all of you who didn't understand, I'm in stage 3)

What if we go sexual on eachother tonight? :p I know we are...kissing has this way of leading to lust, and lust leads to grinding, and grinding leads to less clothes...we're not having sex! Actually..I don't mind him doing stuff on me, and I'd love to do stuff on him, but I'm afraid it will be all wrong and such...
What if he doesn't like it? Will he have the nerve to say it?

oh...well...we'll see what happens...

I wish we were going to the cinema instead...in a way..but because of those stupid armrests you can't even cuddle...





AND JEN - THE RING IS SAID TO NOT BE TOO GOOD REALLY...JUST SO YOU KNOW"

Well..I went on that date with Robin. It was so amazingly nice, it was absolutely great. Even after all the complications that happened before the date. Firs the thing with him saying he wanted to fuck another girl on that day to a friend of his in a convo I was invited into - he was just joking but I got kinda mad anyway. So he apologized...
Then we agreed to meet at 8pm, in my town, to go to a Chinese restaurant. He was getting his hair cut at 6, so he would take the bus to me which went at 7... But then the hairdresser was late, and he couldn't get here before 9... We met up, and walked down to the Chinese restaurant...there it turned out that we were 1 of two couples there tonight. So the owner could really be nice to us...the other couple left and we were alone in the restaurant. I've never heard anyone say that many times that I was beautiful, and I caught him staring at me lovingly several times...
We just talked and talked and talked...it was so great! Totally amazing, never had someone pay so much attention to me I think... (well, actually I have...but that's another story)
Then he spent the night at my place, because he wouldn't catch the bus home... So we went home (after buying me a bunch of candy), and he spent the night downstairs..we spent some time in his bed, just being close...he held me tight - AND WE DIDN'T FOOL AROUND OR HAVE SEX...
I wonder what will happen now...I kinda discovered I wanted to get back together with him...but on the other hand that was a one-time experience, and prolly won't happen again (achieving that feeling I mean).
I think I need and want to stay single..and not get involved with Robin again, or any other guy... I think...at least right now...but now I need some Shrovetide buns...perhaps write more later

Robin and I had agreed to go on a date tomorrow, because it would have been our 1 year anniversary if we were still together... So we agreed on going on a casual/nice dinner and just be together. As friends.
Then today I got invited into a convo between him and his friends, which usually is kinda nice. They all brag about the pussy they get and stuff - and I just play along even thought it hurts. But today he crossed the line.... He mentioned how he was gonna fuck a girl tomorrow and on thursday, a girl who used to go to my school.
1. He's NOT supposed to mention that in front of me to his friends
2. He's NOT supposed to have sex with someone else on that day
3. He's surely NOT supposed to mention it
4. He's now supposed to apologize
5. If he doesn't, I won't come tomorrow and it will ruin everything

...

I'm really hurt

ev388521li

I spent the night at his place last Friday-Saturday. We talked a lot, and decided to break up. Although it still wasn't definite that we wouldn't get back together again. We joked around about doing things with others, and I thought both understood it was joking.
On Saturday morning he said "If you want to, I won't do anything with any other girls," - I answered "I think you should know me well by now, and be able to judge how I feel about this matter yourself."
He had sex Saturday evening.
He said "I thought you wanted it."
He blamed it on my cryptic answer, and the joking we did on Friday.

The fact that he made it out to be my fault, totally broke me. It's like all his cheating turned out to be my fault, and I almost had a breakdown. I cried for an hour - and it took a lot of good friends to beat into my head that it wasn't my fault.

I think it's totally fucked up that he said he thought I wanted it, 'cause if I had wanted it in any way - wouldn't I have just accepted all his cheating? I can't believe he actually thought that. I should have been able to practically beg him to do something with another girl, and he would still have remembered how I really felt. And respected that.

 

Sometimes, during these last two weeks - it's felt like I have to work hard to actually keep him with me. It shouldn't be that way. He should be the one trying to get me back, using every little bit of romantic information he knows and being sincere. I should just have to be there, not make the biggest effort. He even goes around having sex. I think it should be opposite in a way, even though I would never sink to the level of having sex with someone straight after a breakup. I think it's wrong. I think sex is much more important than that.

 

It's so weird... When we first got together, I thought that Jesper (my ex) had cheated on me - 'cause one of his friends had told me so. I made it clear to Robin that this was the absolutely worst thing he could do to me, and he promised never to do it. He actually promised. So I trusted him with my heart, he cheated, and broke it/me.

I decided that everyone deserves a second chance, so I mended my heart, trusted it with him, he cheated - and crushed it. The pieces my heart is in now, slowly started mending, and I reached out to him, hoping he would understand...he had sex - and now I'm too afraid to do it again. My heart is closed within strong walls now, and I have no idea how it will be for future boyfriends. What if there will always be some small thing inside of me holding back?

My heart is in pieces, but protected by a very very strong fortress. It can't be mended by me alone. People aren't meant to be alone... I think that's one of the things people forget easily.

 

Robin still says he wants me back... But I don't feel like he wants it enough to work for it. Why doesn't he understand that I need to get that little Good Night, Love ya message every night? At least get one act of him trying through the day. I've told him a million times how much I love those little good night messages, how they make me able to fall asleep at night. I check my mobile at all times, hoping to find a message from him - but I don't. I feel like I have to tell him to make me find them - but I won't. He needs to figure this one out by himself, using the 11 months he's had to get to know me to figure it out.

 

Why did he do it? I ask this question often, never finding a good answer. They weren't prettier or hotter than me, he told me that himself. They weren't smart, intelligent or interesting - he told me, and everyone else who know them told me. They weren't any good in bed or sexy - everyone knows that. So why did he do it? It would have been easier to understand  uf they were models or something like that... But they weren't.

And I guess they fit with him. 'Cause they fool around with almost every guy in sight it seems...

 

I wish this had never happened.

I wish I was happy.

I wish I could be in his arms forever, and feel his soft lips kiss my forehead goodnight.

I wish I could never ever doubt him again in my life.

I wish he had been smarter.

I wish he had used his head.

I wish he wasn't the asshole he is.

I danced into a quite happy mood today, when I first quit early – then arrived at my dads house to find it empty, and see how he had bought my favorite food..and then I found my CD from S.G.G.L. I’m not sure how many knows this, but my favorite uncle is, and has always been, my uncle in America. (Which is kind of odd, as most tales where someone inherits a lot of money, is from an uncle in America :P)
My uncle was the manager of S.G.G.L., you see.
And all this has just put me in a really good mood =). I’ve also taken up contact with some of the friends I’ve been silent with for a while, and gained some new friendships through other means. All in all, it’s a really brightener in my life these days...
=)

I’m hurting.
Every minute. Every hour. Every day. It totally ruined me. I wake up at night, to the thought of him holding me close to his body and whispering soft words and kissing my forehead to get me to sleep again. It’s like something is missing, a smell, a feeling, a closeness. I start crying at totally random moments, when I do something that might remind me of us. Us. Will it ever be us again? Will it ever be good again?
It’s my choice. I know you want to. And believe me, I want to too. But I don’t want to get hurt again. I don’t want to cry like that again because of you. I want to trust you.
Trust is important in any relationship. One of the most important things. Without trust, there’s no comfort, no way to rest. First you have to earn the trust as a friend. Then we can start thinking about more. I have never trusted anyone less than I trust you right now. It isn’t about whether to tell you secrets, or things like that. I know I can trust you with that.
It’s the important things, trusting you with me. With all my feelings and emotions.
With my heart...
I try to think of it as nothing, that it happens all the time, but I know it’s a big thing. A thing that never should have happened in the first place. I deserve better. You might protest out loud, but you know deep down inside that I do.
Someone who loves me.
Someone I can trust.
Someone who trusts me in return.
Someone I can talk to.
Someone who comes to understand me in time.
Someone who makes me feel like I’m the only woman for him/her.
Someone who takes care of me, someone who can treat me like I deserve.
I believe in love.
Just so you know...
Everyone keeps telling me that I deserve much better and that I should dump you without giving any thoughts to it. My head agrees. My heart doesn’t. Sometimes you don’t seem to understand. Why I don’t know. It’s like a part of you thinks it’s only a game, even though I know you don’t think it is.
I talked to her. We both got pissed off at you. I know you didn’t want to hurt me, but I wish you would have told me everything. Everything. I only need honesty right now. I want to be friends with you even if I decide not to get back together with you. If only you had told me...it hurt. Hearing her talking about things you hadn’t already told me. Realizing that you were hiding things. Important things. Of course I know you can’t tell me everything, but this was rather important if you ask me. All I really wanted to do was break down. Right there, in front of everyone.
I didn’t.
I wanted you to come and hug me. Hold me. Wrap your arms around me. But I know you wouldn’t, so I couldn’t let down the mask. You know me better than most people. You know when something is wrong, when I want to talk about it, and when I don’t want to. You know when I’m putting on a show for others, or for you - in front of your friends. You know when you should mention it, and when you should keep it private.
Why did you do it?
We will never know. We can´t blame it on the alcohol. You´re taking full responsibility. And you know I´m hurting.

Happy New Year folks!!!

And Kurt Nilsen won World Idol!!!


Norway rocks!!!

Robin cheated on me again... :(

G-g-guess who's dangerous now!

Yesterday I achieved 8th Kyu of Kyokushinkai karate. First blue belt in other words. Took me one and a half years. And he didn't have anything to say about my performance...

*proud of herself*

*hugs everyone*

I met him today...Magic..Scary...We had to hide, because I wasn't allowed to go..We met under the stairs, hidden away in a corner. We hugged each other close first, before we went through the "how are you"'s and "what's been happening lately"'s... And I asked why he had asked me to meet him. He looked down, hesitated a bit, then told me he missed me. I had tears in my eyes the whole time, the whole 20 minutes. We talked a bit about me, how I was feeling, he asked how I was without him. I told him that it was horrible, I couldn't lie about it. We talked some more..then it was time for him to go - he had to go to class...He was then already 5 minutes late. We hugged....for a long emotional time...Tight..close to each other...Stroking each others backs.. He kissed my cheek...And we hugged more...How I've missed his strong arms holding me tight. We kissed...Softly, first only a soft peck, before it turned into one of those passionate kisses that you always see on movies where he supports her head with his hand. It was as great as it looks like on movies. Then we hugged some more...wonderful hugs...And he kissed my forehead and looked deep into my eyes as he said he Loved me...and then we hugged again...And then he had to go...
I miss him..and the meeting lifted me up...a lot...so if he breaks my heart now..he'll ruin me...